Suffering

"We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope."

Romans 5:3-4

 

 

Consider for a moment what you have learned as a SP. Maybe some of you are thinking at this point, "Yeah, I've learned how short my fuse is, just how little patience I actually do NOT have and just how much parenting exposes my best me (NOT)!" No, no, no...Now, that you've got that out of the way, truly think about what you have learned and gained being a SP. I can think of a couple things: patience (um, yes, even though I am reminded daily just how much of a work in progress I really am in this area), self-sacrificial love (it SO isn't about me as a SP) and an appreciation for the "little things" (never has "clapping" been more thrilling then when my 10 month old does it with that cute smile of his!). I could go on and on...But, what if I told you the things you know now couldn't have been learned any other way than through your journey as a SP?

 

I often think my kids have taught me more about the love and grace of Jesus and about what the purpose of life is really all about than what I have actually taught them. Think, for a minute, about the characteristics of Jesus. He was (is) patient. He was (is) loving and so much so He gave His only Son to die for us in order to live (James 3:16). He was sinless. We are not. He took our sins on Him so we could live (ah, amazing gift)! And He loves unconditionally. No matter how much we mess up, He still loves and forgives us (amazing gifts!). So, when you consider how Jesus was (is), what do you think He is trying to teach us as SPs? What have you learned as a SP that another experience couldn't have taught you?!

 

God's all about growing our character. He cares about the people we're becoming. Are you wondering how a short fuse and little patience makes you into a person of character? I did! Consider what suffering does. It teaches us something about ourselves. When people found out I was raising a newborn and 2 year old by myself and working full time I often got a look of bewilderment and what followed was a series of questions wanting to know how I was managing it. What I really wanted to say was, "Really?! These gigantic bags under my eyes, disheveled, unkempt hair and sluggish demeanor aren't telling enough?!" I also heard, from well-intentioned loving people: "You find out just how strong you are in a situation like this," and "You are a lot stronger than me, I never could do that!" Quite honestly, these were the last things I felt! In fact, I learned just how weak I really was and how incredibly strong  God is! 

 

In my weakness, He makes me strong with His power and love (2 Corinthians 12:9). I finally have come to truly understand what this verse means! I couldn't have known that without the suffering and the struggle. As I sit (closely) towards the outside of the fire (instead of being in the center of its flame), I can see what happened to me had to happen. I don't think I could know the peace and joy I now have (ironically, I didn't experience this kind of joy and peace when I thought my life was "good"). I wouldn't know the Lord the way I know Him now, and I believe God knew that too (and was why He allowed it to happen). 

 

He knows what He had to allow to happen in order to get my attention, to bring me closer to Him. I still had a choice. I could have turned and walked the other way, but I know He came to rescue me. I also know He loves me and didn't want me to suffer (it was probably harder for Him to refrain from dousing the fire with water and to not allow me to walk in the flame at all). But, because He loves me so incredibly, He had to take it all away to show me just how much He loves me! He shows me that He can fill every one of my needs. I don't need to rely on worldly things that can't even begin to compare to the blessings I've received from being with Him. Another amazing mystery of the Lord! 

 

Out of Tragedy Comes Triumph  

 

That night I heard your prayer.

I answered it by telling you I'd always be there.

 

You did not hear me then.

You understood something big was about to occur,

But never expected your life to become such a blur.

 

I knew what lie ahead for you,

And, oh, how My heart ached as I knew what you had to go through.

 

Before it even took place,

I saw you there, on the floor, tears running down your face.

If only I could tell you what I meant by, "I give you My grace."

 

But in allowing you to suffer and endure the pain,

I knew a deeper relationship with Me you would gain.

 

Your gut-retching despair was the richest blessing in disguise.

It has brought you to Me and in that you have become wise.

 

Because it is the Lord your God you with your heart fear,

I reveal the mysteries of the Lord, and to Me, I hold you dear.

 

Oh, My precious child, there was no other way to make you like Me in each and every way.

And, oh, how for your broken heart I do pray.

And that your soul will hurt no more one day.

 

Do not lose hope and heart.

It was time to say good-bye to lesser dreams - allow them to depart.

 

My plans for you are bigger and tip the scale.

Do you not know the Will of the Lord can never be thwarted to fail.

 

This realization comes only from the trial

And from suffering for a while.

 

Now the time has come. I have made you new.

My glory and grace can now shine through you.

 

That night I heard your prayer.

I answered it by telling you I'd always be there.

 

You did not hear Me then - way back when. You hear Me now.

I speak to you from within, and you truly come to know Me the more you turn from sin.

 

My heart aches for you as yours does for Mine.

You are My beloved and My love for you makes you shine.